High above the bustling streets of Dubai, in the world's tallest and most luxurious skyscraper, reside the gods and goddesses of the modern world. Since they emerged 14 billion years ago from a bus blaring a tune remarkably similar to the Mister Softee jingle, they've wreaked mischief and havoc on mankind. Unable to control their jealousies, the gods have splintered into several factions, led by the immortal enemies XOXO, Shanice, La Felina, Fast-Cooking Ali, and Mogul Magoo. Ike Karton, an unemployed butcher from New Jersey, is their current obsession.
I had to do a double-take when I saw this cover on Amazon, The Sugar Frosted Nutsack...? What in the world is that about??? There were quite a few plot scenarios going through my head in that moment, but not one of them came close to the asinine truth. I can find something good to say about every book I read, but this... novel... threw me for a loop. I had to force myself to get past chapter one, the language and ridiculous names/concepts insulting. I understood that there were Gods and Goddesses, and that they all had a few "screws loose", but other than that, I couldn't figure out what in the world was actually happening. The characters seemed to do things for no reason in particular, and without reason there was only chaos - a collection of nonsensical phrases leading nowhere. I guess the only redeemable qualities I could find were Mark Leyner's word choices and sentence formats, but even they could not make me overlook the obvious flaws. I felt like I was trying to read as fast as humanly possible in order to finish, the inane characters and dialogue far from attention-worthy. I usually prefer ideas that are out-of-the box, but the highly repetitive and annoying dialogue left me drowning and confused in a sea of sugar frosted frivolity. Enjoyed the handful of laughs, but overall, I felt that the book was, "artisanal bull[****] of the highest order," (TSFN p.199). I can not honestly recommend this as suitable reading material for any age...
Rating: Toe-Tag (1/5)
*** I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.